Dog Bonk

"If dogs could talk, perhaps we would find it as hard to get along with them as we do with people."

    -Capek-

I love dogs. I must for I have three, each with personalities as individual as you or I.  One of my herd, Maverick - the Amazing Beardie, appears to have been blessed with the most personality and is a constant source of amusement and frustration for all of us. This morning was no exception.

Occasionally, I have to move to the couch in the middle of the night because Darling snores. I don't necessarily like it, but came to accept it years ago. It makes for a much better night this way. Maverick hasn't quite grasped the concept of letting sleeping writers sleep. This morning about 0500 hours, I was right in the middle of a pizza dream. (I know it was a pizza dream because it was weird enough that I was like, "Duuuuuude." And now with the light of day, I can't freakin' remember it. Stupid dog.)
However, he comes up and nose bumps me.

The nose bump.
Ingenious.
Frustrating.
Guaranteed to get your attention.
Almost guaranteed to get a dog shot.

What is it you might ask? Well... Maverick is tall enough that his head can pretty comfortably sit on my dining room table so he's a pretty big dog and could theoretically use his size to great advantage. But instead, when you are sound asleep and the "Dog Stare" doesn't wake up you, he comes and bumps your face with his nose. It's all rather Snoopy and Charlie Brown. Unlike Snoopy, it's not nearly as cute at 0500 hours.

Maverick nose bumped me at 0500. I told him in no uncertain terms to go lay down and leave me alone.

Maverick nose bumped me again at 0530. I got up and let him outside under the assumption he really had to go. I didn't want an accident and I didn't want to clean it up.

THE MOMENT I let him out and shut the door. He began talking to a friend of his.

It's not like he could have waited a couple of hours I suppose, but really?

So, I opened the door and "yelled" at him to quit talking about the squirrels or birds or what have you and to come - back - inside - now!

He came. Shock.

I went and laid back down and from my perch on the couch I told him, "Dufus. Lay down."

I just got back to sleep and just started another pizza dream.

Bonk.

The alarm went off one minute later.  Yes. One. Instead of hitting the snooze, I bonked him back.

Day 67 - A Day for the Irish or the Tired

Happy St. Patrick's day to one and all. I hope this day has found you blessed beyond measure and full of joy and if not joy... beer. This has been one of the longest days or rather, it has felt like one of the longest days. It's 9:30pm and I'm in my jammies already tucked in bed because my level of exhaustion is through the roof. I am hoping a blessed sleep comes quickly. However, I did want to try to jot a few thoughts before I drifted off in the Land of Nod.

My cousin-in-law's wife, her sister and the FIVE children are in town visiting. I have decided a few things after this visit that are crystal clear and really have nothing to do with any of them.

1) I am not a little people person. I never have been a little people person. Even when my own children were small, I can say I was not a huge fan. Yes, I loved them more than life itself (and I still do.) However, I have to say that as they have gotten older, I really do find them a lot more interesting. I love listening to what they have to say and I love watching their thought processes. My girls have changed immensely from six to sixteen and now they are starting to know who they are and they express themselves in a way that I can truly appreciate. I know there are millions of women who loooooooove babies and the little ones. I have to say, with the rare exception (my nephew Erik for one), I'll take a teenager any day of the week. I'm sure there are many who will claim sacrilege. I say, "honest."

2) My children are now old enough that when I was asked to buy 3T-4T pull-ups tonight, I was actually confused. I purchase bras and panties for my girls and haven't even looked at a pull-up in many a moon (slight pun intended.) I was so grateful I didn't have to regularly shop at Babies R Us or Toys R Us or anything like that any more. I was instantly grateful that I no longer had to worry about breast feeding or formula or baby cereal or food or diaper bags or toys or pacifiers or bottles or sippy cups. The relief was instantaneous and I made eldest DD carry the pull-ups to the register so I wouldn't have to. And really... even though we went through our fair share of pull-ups, I still wonder what all the fuss is about because truthfully, kids know how to undo their own diapers at that age. Seriously wonder if you could throw a poise pad in a pair of panties and have better results. Oh well... until grandchildren many moons from now - my days are done.

3) My final thought on the children thing is noise. Oh mother. My girls can make more noise than the Texas Jam sometimes and my head can ring for quite awhile. However, because they are older, the noise level is usually not this piercing "shriek" that can be heard by dogs 23 miles away. Multiply that shriek by four and add in a newborn baby's subtle cry (not the "feed me now lest I kill you in your sleep" cry) it was LOUD. And don't tell me you don't know the shrieking I'm talking about because ever since the first dogs looked at Adam and Eve's kids, they had that moment where they looked at each other and said, "Seriously? That's annoying and it hurts our little ears." Piece together the shrieks of the little ones with the fact American Idol was on and the fact that I had a long day at work and am rather cranky.... you can imagine my relief when my eldest advised me she had to go to Barnes and Noble to get a book for school.

I know I have been rambling and I'm sure I have much more to say, but will work on it later. Huggies and Goodnights...

Day 62 - Ramblings About Time

Yesterday was eldest's 17th birthday. It's hard to believe how quickly 17 years goes by because it seems like it was just a few months ago. I can't say it "seems like yesterday" as many memories have faded into the nothing, but it definitely doesn't feel like it's approaching the two decade marker.

And side note, it just occurred to me that I'm just a couple of years out from my 25th high school reunion. Why is it when we are young that seems more than a lifetime away, but now that it's approaching, it feels not that long ago? My dad had a theory that the older we get, the faster time passes. I'm beginning to believe he was absolutely correct. I think this quickening of the passage of time is not so much in terms of absolute scientific principle, but in terms of mental status. I can't explain it really, but I do believe it exists. It's kind of like God, only with less BAM! I can't prove God exists, but I believe He is there all around us and He does things only He understands.

As far as diet and exercise have gone the past week, I have thought about it and that's a far as the process has gone. I've been trying to sort out this thing called life and my personal health has taken a back seat to trying to tame the mental animals running amuck in my head. There are really too many things going on lately and I haven't been sleeping well or anything else. Frustrating.

Time change is tonight. I hate this stupid, freakin', daylight savings time crap. (Speaking of not sleeping well lately.) I don't know why we still do it. It's not all that important to have daylight at 10pm. I seriously would be pleased if they would fix it. I found a quote that sums up my feelings rather nicely.

A writer in 1947 noted, "I don't really care how time is reckoned so long as there is some agreement about it, but I object to being told that I am saving daylight when my reason tells me that I am doing nothing of the kind. I even object to the implication that I am wasting something valuable if I stay in bed after the sun has risen. As an admirer of moonlight I resent the bossy insistence of those who want to reduce my time for enjoying it. At the back of the Daylight Saving scheme I detect the bony, blue-fingered hand of Puritanism, eager to push people into bed earlier, and get them up earlier, to make them healthy, wealthy and wise in spite of themselves." (Robertson Davies, The Diary of Samuel Marchbanks, 1947, XIX, Sunday.)

Well, I think I need to get some real rest. Got to get up early (as it were) to take Maverick to the groomers for the summer shave. I know it's not summer, but he smells like dog. Love the boy, but dog smell is blah. Time to get him less canine and more fru-fru.... LOL!

Ciao Bella...

Day 12 - Thirsty Thursday

In the wee hours of the morning, I moved from my warm snuggly bed to the couch in the living room. Insomnia sucks. Fortunately, I turned on the living room light because in doing so I saw Jenny the schnauzer laying on the ottoman. She's normally curled up on the goosedown blanket I keep on the couch because I get cold and if I have to nap, it's perfect. She slunk to the love seat from the ottoman and me - I just thought I woke her up from a hard sleep and she was tired. The blanket however wasn't so perfect as I got closer. She piddled on my blankie. I was so not amused. So instead of curling up with my favorite blanket, I had to suddenly do a washload, find another big blanket and then try to relax. I know dogs really don't understand the concept of a "shit list." She's made mine.

Health & Fitness #12 A black belt is a white belt that never gave up.

Food tally for the day:
Breakfast: Cheese stick, carrots and grapes - 16 oz. bottle of water
Morning Snack: Cheese stick #2, more carrots and more grapes as well as 2 mugs of hot tea.
Lunch: Lean Cuisine - Chicken and Veggies
Afternoon Snack: Cherry Jello
Dinner: 212 pieces of pizza. Ok... not that many, but did have my fair share and I did enjoy. So there.

Feeding the Spirit #12 Imagination is more important than knowledge - Albert Einstein -